Its been awhile since my first post and A LOT has happened in the world and in my personal life. Between a global pandemic, job changes, an ADHD diagnosis for me (finally!), autism and ADHD diagnoses for my son, and separating from my ex husband…. this blog and my classes have taken a backseat.

I won’t lie….using the Positive Discipline method over the past three years has been really hard. I’m tired and overwhelmed and just don’t have the energy most of the time. I’ve found myself yelling more than I care to admit, being more permissive and not really having strong boundaries or follow through. There’s this cycle of me telling my kids they need to do something (ie clean their room), them not cleaning, me not making them because I’m too tired, then eventually me exploding because “why can’t they be responsible and why should I have to do everything?!” and ending with(you guessed it)…..me cleaning their room for them when they’re at their dad’s place.

….. and this makes it hard for me to get on here and write about a parenting method that I’ve always been so passionate about, yet can’t seem to put into practice myself lately. But I’ve come to the realization that this is actually the PERFECT time and reason. Because it shows that you don’t have to be perfect and that small steps can make a difference. (That and I need something to hold myself accountable.)

So here I am, trying to get myself back and track and hoping I’ll be able to help and inspire someone else in the process. If anything, I just want you to know you aren’t alone.

You don’t have to be perfect at positive discipline to be a good parent…. even small steps towards incorporating positive discipline techniques into your parenting can make a difference in your child’s behavior and well being. It’s okay to make mistakes and to have moments where you lose your cool or don’t handle a situation perfectly. What’s important is that you acknowledge your mistakes and try to learn from them, while also working towards creating a positive and supportive environment for your child.

All this is to say: self care is important! You can’t pour from an empty cup, so find what fills yours. It’s ok to take time for yourself, even a few minutes a day can make a difference. It will make you a better parent and a better partner.

Taking time for self care is also a great way to start a conversation with your children and gives the opportunity for you to model positive behavior for them. This conversation can be as simple as explaining why it’s important to take a break and do something that makes us feel good, whether it’s reading a book, going for a walk, or taking a nap. By modeling self-care behavior, you can teach your children how to prioritize their own well-being and make self-care a part of their daily routine. It can also help children learn how to manage stress and emotions in a healthy way.

I’ll talk about this more in next week’s post where I’ll introduce the concept of time out vs time in and will give ideas on how to create a calming space for your child.

Until then, I’ll leave you with one of my favorite parenting quotes by Sue Atkins: There’s no such thing as a perfect parent so just be a real one.